Open the eyes of my heart

I drove back to my house with a chip on my shoulder. It had been a long day and now, after running three kids to three different locations, I was not happy that I was driving back to my house to get a pair of basketball shoes.

"Grab some goldfish crackers too."

The text jumped off the phone at me and about made me throw my precious cell phone out the car window!  I had heard moms describe themselves as "taxi-moms" and some even had a little magnet on their car to proclaim the title, but seriously, this is getting ridiculous!  Three kids. Three gyms. Three trips. And Sam hadn't even arrived yet!

I always knew my children would be involved in athletics. I even remember with absolute clarity being on a walk when I lived in Minneapolis years ago and seeing some kids playing in a driveway. Doug and I were dating long distance at the time, and I remember thinking, "Wow, if this works out between us, someday I will have tall, lanky children in sports!"

Well, that day is here and while most trips to practice occur with relative ease, this particular day, I was not the happiest of campers about it!

You see, just before I gathered up the kids, grabbed the gym bags, checked for Gatorade, headbands, and arm sleeves, I had gotten an email from someone who had just returned from Ghana. She took the most amazing photos and one of them had captured my heart just before I left as taxi-mom.

The photo was of a group of boys in line to do a basketball drill. This is not a new picture to me. Daily I see kids lined up in Doug's camps, waiting for their turn to dribble the ball, make the pass, or take the shot. Daily I watch kids run in and out of the gym, excited to play the game.

But daily, I also see kids upset and crying because they didn't win "dribble knock-out" or because their team didn't earn the Gatorade prize. Daily I see parents (myself included) cater to their children...asking what they want for dinner, succumbing to the cries and whining when the kids beg for McDonald's, and buying the newest pair of tennis shoes when the other pair isn't even close to being worn out.

Daily I see this and daily I do this!

So that my dear sisters is why this picture...this picture...jumped off the page at me...



Photo courtesy of Odle Mountain Photography

The picture just tells such a story.

The shoes are worn.

The feet are close together, ready to get their turn.

And the one boy...the one in the middle...is just so happy to be at camp, even without shoes!!! 

You see, these children do not care if their tennis shoes have a Lebron symbol on them. They do not care if they have shoes the same color as their team uniform. They do not care if they even have shoes on their feet!! They are just happy for the opportunity to play!

So, when the text came for me to make the trip back to my house to get my son's "basketball shoes" because he had left them and couldn't possibly wear his other "non-basketball shoes" for practice, my heart was troubled.

I was troubled at my own greed. I was troubled at what I was teaching my child by my running back to get the shoes and catering to his lack of responsibility. And, I was troubled at our wealth.

I don't know...God is doing a big work on my heart these past few weeks! I am just trying to stay open to what He has to say. For when I stand before Him and I don't want Him to ask me why I fed my own children and gave my own children new shoes but didn't feed His people or clothe His people.  And I surely don't want to have to say, "When did I see them Lord?"  

Open the eyes of my heart Lord. Open the eyes of my heart!

With love and conviction,

Jen